On pursuing the quiet life in Silicon Valley
William Hodges: Jaques and the Wounded Stag, 1790. Image by Wikimedia Commons
It's far too easy—especially living in the nation's tech capital—to measure our success by achievements. Degrees. Titles. But milk fed blog's Caitlyn Richardson rejects this performative chasing after the wind, and invites us instead to choose “boring” lives of simplicity, joy, and unimaginable richness.
there’s a pervasive myth that has seeped into every corner of our current reality claiming that in order to have a meaningful life, we’re told that worth is measured in titles, achievements, and the scope of our influence. it’s a myth that demands endless striving …
we see the consequences both good and bad of the lives of successful ceo’s, mega influencers, celebrities, etc… but what about the people who live smaller, quieter lives? the people who don’t reach for the summit of our sisyphusean existence, but rather, find meaning in the climb itself? …
camus’s myth of sisyphus speaks to this so poignantly. he asks us to imagine sisyphus happy, repeatedly and tirelessly rolling his boulder up the hill, only for it to tumble back down again- a metaphor for futility. but camus reframes this as a story of defiance. sisyphus doesn’t find meaning in reaching the summit—he finds it in the act of pushing the boulder. his happiness isn’t in escaping the climb but rather, embracing it, despite the inevitable struggle that comes with work of any kind.
this feels deeply relevant to the way society views success- a falsified glorification of the summit: the promotions, the accolades, the wealth. but the summit is a moving target. no matter how high you climb, there’s always another peak in the distance. … the people who reject this pursuit and find meaning in the climb itself, are often dismissed as unambitious or small. …
i spent many family dinner parties growing up listening to my grandparents belittle my aunt and uncle for choosing the path less traveled: raising their son abroad in france, spain and italy, teaching him multiple languages, living a frugal, simple, content, culturally rich life. … i think about their lives often- a quiet rebellion against this relentless culture of striving. they were teachers, readers, and travelers, not in the curated, performative way we see on social media but with an authenticity that is increasingly rare. their home was filled with books, art, and conversation. they didn’t chase wealth or status, yet their lives felt richer than anything money could buy. …
his type of existence isn’t new or profound—quite the contrary, it’s as old as the human struggle to find meaning. in either/or, kierkegaard explores the difference between the aesthetic life and the ethical life, a dichotomy that feels remarkably relevant in today’s world of curated social media feeds and performative success. the aesthetic life is about surface—chasing pleasure, beauty, and external validation. it’s the life of the summit, constantly striving for recognition and achievement, often at the expense of inner fulfillment.
the ethical life, by contrast, is inward-facing. it’s not concerned with appearances but with authenticity, integrity, and the quiet work of becoming. …
the past two years in particular, i’ve felt myself craving moments that don’t make headlines, but rather, a formulation of a life worth living. breakfast in bed on a sunday morning- sticky buns and black coffee, sharing a bed with my best friend. having more children. walking through the park while listening to the sounds of nature and kids laughing in the playground nearby. decompressing after a day at work on the couch with a cat who nestles besides my belly while i read, sip hot tea, and listen to tender jazz. cooking pasta for dinner, drinking wine, slow dancing in the kitchen with a lover. maybe starting a garden. farmers markets on weekends carrying a wicker basket full of apricots and hydrangeas. a soft, romantic, simple existence.
simple, but significant.
these moments are not distractions from life, but rather, a defining reality of what it means to have everything.
Read the whole thing here.
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